[Hammer and Linux] Episode 03. The Linux That Made Me Quit Drinking, and Starting Over

Regretting it now does nothing. It wasn't a bus that had left, it was code that had left. Back then, just hearing the "c" of "code" made irritation well up and I wanted to forget it.

But strangely, the urge to rebuild it surged. Ah, desire has to arise... no, the urge... In the end I started over. There was a backup file from before. I recalled it and loaded it again.

Boy, but this time was completely different from the start. After rolling it a few times, I roughly understood it now. So this is what repeated mastery is. lol

Those days when I couldn't live without a drink

I said I've been seriously studying Linux for a year. Before that I drank enormously. Coming home after work, all I did was drink. Not ice cream — alcohol. Not Chamisul or Achimisul. lol I could drink two plastic bottles a day.

The routine was almost always the same. Finish work, drink, sleep. What a clean daily life. There was nothing else. Luckily I'd gotten an office-cum-lodging outside, and I lived there. For about two years I lived alone, about an hour and a half from home.

It was so comfortable. Is there anyone to reform you? A nagging wife? If there is a heaven, I figured it might be here. There were minor inconveniences, but they were bearable.

Know what I did on days off? I drank. From morning to night.

I'm lucky I didn't die then.

Why would I quit such good booze?

Why would I quit such good booze? Because I met the Lord? No. It was after I met Linux.

Maybe because it was a boyhood dream, I happened to see a hacking series on YouTube at home. If you search "nomadic" on YouTube it comes up. Watching it I got interested and bought a book.

Still, I'm at least lucky that I like reading books. Looking at that book — wow, what is this. I understood nothing. You have to know something to read or not read it, but Linux commands, IT terms, all English. Normally I'd have thrown the book, but strangely curiosity arose.

And the good thing about today's world is that tailored education is possible. Type "Linux basics" on YouTube and it teaches you in detail like teaching an elementary schooler. These days they call it online courses. They're everywhere. Enormously many. Endless repetition, until it's in your ear, until it's in your eye. I even played them while sleeping.

No, I found myself watching YouTube even in my dreams. I couldn't tell if it was a dream or reality. lol

English, a wall I cannot cross

For the first time in my life I regretted not studying. Ah, I should have studied English a bit.

In life I envied Americans the most. To what degree? These days all IT terms are English. But I don't know the phonetic symbols. So memorizing them is harder. You have to be able to read something to mumble and memorize it. This is memorizing by looking at pictures — people who haven't been through it won't understand.

You have to know something to study. Setting Linux aside, I can't even read. lol

I thought, what nonsense is this at my age. Just don't do it, what the... what am I going to use it for, learning it now. Better to learn plastering or welding and earn money. What am I going to use it for, learning it now.

Not joking, it's completely useless. I'm not going to become a programmer, nor am I going to get a job at an IT company.

I don't even understand why I did it

I don't even understand why I did it. Losing sleep, the time I spent drinking and passing out began to feel like a waste. Why? To listen to Linux courses and study.

I think I'm crazy. I quit drinking to learn Linux.

In my whole life I had never once thought of quitting drinking, not even in a dream. Why? Because I drank in my dreams too.

Now it's been over a year since I quit. Now I finish work and study until dawn, then sleep. Not study, just intellectual curiosity.

And between those nights, the code began to come back to life.

Continues in the next episode: a year of studying Linux, and the rebuilt code turned out different this time.